Born as a girl in India itself ensures that there will be a story, A story with copious upheavals!! A story worth sharing! I’m a girl, born and raised in a modern B-town step up. Blessed with parents who were resourceful and kind enough to give me an extremely comfortable life. However, the mental conditioning of being a girl did not do any good to me. Biasness against me with enforced stringent behavioural norms while my brother would have more freedom and liberty, often made me feel caged. Most important rule during adolescence, 'no boys as friends' leave alone any boyfriend!

As per the social norms, I was married in my mid-twenties. I was thrown in the lap of real-life scenario with a stereotypical man from urban Indian society. Often our arguments and mismatches in expectations would lead to physical abuse. Everything including my work and career would happen based on his approvals. I spent 3 years with a belief system that marriages are analogous. One must make compromises and adjustments. Only as I grew to ask myself one day that is it fine for a man to be infidel? Can he disappear for weeks and leave his wife to struggle for sustainability and bewilderment?? Well, post one considerable traumatic episode of physical and verbal abuse, it occurred to me that this was abnormal. More so, even though all marriages are believed to be similar, I don’t wish to be part of such an arrangement.

Another myth of mine nicked that no matter what, my folks would stand by me. Yes! my parents turned out to be even weaker and took immense persuasion from my end to pull me out of his house. They didn’t let me stay alone to start life afresh or allow me to figure things out. As per norms, I had to move back in with them. Life at parents’ home was even worse emotionally. Social stigma attached to divorce made them creep into their own shell while an emotionally wrecked me was thrown in isolation, trapped in their house like a caged pigeon waiting endlessly to be rescued.

After months of relying on my destiny to make a shift, I was done with the humiliation that came from indifferent attitude. The words of sarcasm echoed my ears as I spent days in a closed room practically scared of even peeping out of the window. One day, on an impulse I chose to pack my bags and move back to Bangalore in search of a new life away from the clutches of social drama.

It takes a lot for a girl to break the norms and shatter the glass ceiling. The road to self-discovery was adventurous yet immensely fruitful. The lessons taught by life were put into perspective. Dealing with human emotions especially men became more profound, while it also taught me 'Self-love'.

The men cannot have it all, when a relationship doesn't work. Only a girl shouldn’t be blamed for a failed relationship. Families can’t look down upon her as a burden, as though she would be stuck till she finds a bout of luck to move ahead with someone, else she learns to accept and adjust wherever she was.

After 2 years of self-discovery, I met my now husband through a family friend. I trusted the man with my newly found wisdom and clarity. Perhaps the inner shift helped me attract a man who loved me the way I am. As individuals we are immersed in self-love only to love each other immensely. You can only give something what you have!!

One year into this blissful marriage, I was diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer. The emotional blocks from the past manifested into physical reality! But the man I married, became my sole source of strength. He taught me how not be a victim and arise like a warrior. The power of love is equipped with healing properties. We both have fixed the broken pieces of our lives with dignity and self-respect. We continue to love selflessly!!